Friday, November 13, 2009


well today I was dead tired in the morning at school xD

like I felt it so much today. I was almost falling asleep in history class, then I felt seriously sluggish in geometry.

Lunch time woke me up a bit, and so did gym.

Most hw is in english and chemistry, and I'm scared to do chemistry ;_; and I have essay due next friday in english. GAAAAAH



well tomorrow getting up EXTRA early cause I'm going shopping at costco with guidance counselor for the student council xD

means I'm gonna be tired in morn again x.x but she needs help, so i wont complain.

I'm getting back into old songs i used to dance to, and I think I might start dancing again. I miss it. I think? xD

lately been writing short blogs ;^; i miss having more to write about! but I have nothing in mind now, so I guess continuation of this will--



Now I know what I can type about 8]



xD okay alex get on with it.

Well I haven't gotten my dosage of Mikee since like week before last week D: and I miss her and all, but I keep thinking about the relationship a lot lately.

Like, should I just end it, should I stay with her cause I love her so much, should I forget about thinking that this will last, etc.

One big thought that stood out was:

I should leave her, but I love her so much, so why should I when things are going well?

Its like I wanna dump her but I don't want to at same time!

I think I'm comparing inrl relationships to online ones. Considering my relationship with Mikee is online, I'm having a lot of doubts about me being able to last so long like this. On top of that, I only get to speak to her like once a week, or so.

and it kills me because I NEED her with me like each day. I WISH I could have her everyday with me. But I've told her, even if she can't come on week days like she said, coming on even just once on the weekend would make me so happy.

It would count as my "dosage" of her. Yes she's a drug, got a prob with that?

anywayz...yeah, I've been thinking about all this a lot. it's pissing me off cause I have feeling I'm going to end up hurting her. She's such freakin' angel, and I love her. But it's like, I need more than just words in a window chat, I think that's how I'm starting to feel.

I need her next to me, going to the same school as me, studying with me, eating lunch with me, coming over to my house, dancing and singing with me, DOING EVERYTHING WITH ME!

number one thing ofc, making out

rofl xD

anywayz, thats just whats been on my mind for like past 2 days.

thats it for now, so, laterz everyone :D


Kat said...

I know all those feelings, Alex D':

I was obsessed with Joosu x__x
Just loved him so much :'3

Real life relationships are better than online ones, In my opinion, not just because you see the person more,

but because you're 100% sure they're actually who they say they are, and not making things up =/

Mind you, there's all this criticism about online relationships cause they never last, blah blah, but honestly,

i've known people who's relationships have lasted, and they've met up and stayed together and blah blah.

If you love her THAT much, and if she loves you the same amount.. don't let her go :3

Joona said...


I already told aelix but i post here too.

IF you love someone it doesn't matter if you can't touch them or kiss them or hold them. Because those are trivial things which shouldn't matter ,if you truly love.

Wanting to leave someone coz you can't kiss them. Shallow. Wanting to leave someone coz you don't see them everyday. Shallow.

On the internet you fall in love with someones personality. As long as they're acted for real then it's the purest type of love you can get.

IRL Your minds clouded with how the person looks, how they talk, how they walk, how they dress. Because even if we don't try to, or subconscious mind thinks this kinda shit.

You can't love someone if you barely know them, you can't Love someone from their looks. That, is whats called fake love.

Some people are liek WOOAH YOUR GF STAYED WITH YOU AFTER FAKE PICS? Well duh? Why wouldn't she? Despite the fact that I lied nothing changed. I'm who I am. I'm not some photo, I'm Joona. And she loved me for that.

The reason internet relationships have this terrible looming misconception over it is because of the amount of shallow idiots out there.

Once they realize, HEY. I WANT SEX. OR REAL GF/BF. They'll move on.

Idiots arn't ment for online relationships, which means the majority of the web.

My relationship lasted 2 years because we love who we are. Not some foto, not the way we dress, not that we fuck everynight. No. None of it.

Because when you truly love someone, distance, and time doesn't matter :P